Rough Draft Paragraph

"A human’s visual sense allows them to form an opinion on the subject that they are viewing quickly. Publishers and teenage girls realize this fact and focus their appearance on that. First the publisher must decide who their target audience is. From here they will pick a cover photo and write a short but intriguing description in an effort to draw readers in. Just as a teenage girl posts beautiful pictures of herself with any flaw edited out in an effort to appeal to boys and jealous girls, a publisher for In Focus will post a picture that pulls in a curious reader. In Focus chooses their photos based on obscurity, the fewer questions it answers the better. Although their photos are often obscure in their ability to tell the readers the meaning, they are vibrant in colors and interesting to look at. The photos on a teenage girl’s Facebook page and those found on In Focus’s home page often contain similar characteristics, vibrant colors, a seemingly effortless beauty, and they of course arise some form of appeal to its target audience. Along with the features of the photos, the publisher must consider their layout."

This paragraph shows my weakness of elaboration and failure to introduce a paragraph well. I need to find more evidence from In Focus to incorporate in order to complete my elaboration and support my statements.